Misunderstood

So...

Have you ever had one of those times when you say something to a person or a group of persons, and the response is not at all what you were expecting? Maybe you haven't. I, however, have had many. I was pondering this in the shower the other day. I've gotten to the point where I can tell by the look on someone's face if they are really getting what I'm saying or just nodding to be polite. Even Josh does it to me. He gets this glaze in his eyes and just nods. I imagine most of the time he does this is because he knows how I hate to repeat myself and doesn't want to say, "What?" one more time. I've relayed the story to him of a time when I was asking my sister a question, and she THREE times asked me to repeat myself. Finally, when I put my hands on her face and made her pay attention to me, did she hear what I had to say. At times, I think it's probably because I speak softly, which makes it understandable why people don't get what I'm saying. Truly though, I feel like many times people just don't get me. I personally find myself extremely funny, but I have come to realize that not everyone shares that thought.

*Disclaimer for what's to come* No offense to anyone who posted on my Facebook page recently regarding a thought that I had in my status. I know your responses were in love. :)

Recently, after listening to someone talk about how he had yelled at his son, I was so convicted because of the way I treat my children sometimes. They deserve SO MUCH MORE grace than I give them. I just started thinking of all the times that I've overreacted to something they've done or said or didn't do, or whatever--all because I was tired, or my pregnancy hormones were in full swing, or "they just need to learn". My Heavenly Father is never too tired to treat me with kindness, and I do not feel like He ever thinks, "My gosh, I have told her over and over not to do that. She should know by now that that makes me furious." I realize that my boys need discipline; I'm not saying they don't. There are just so many times that I have flown off the handle for something so insignificant because in my mind it's justified. I want to be mad. I want to yell. I'm so tired of dealing with that. I realize the Lord doesn't expect me to behave as He would, nor am I so ignorant to think this is attainable. All I'm saying is my boys deserve better. I was actually glad of this conviction I had because it first led me to actually realize, Mary Ann, what you are doing is not okay, and it is not justified! You can say the same thing with lovingkindness, gentleness, and self-control (among other things). It also led to a great conversation with Josh.

Anyway, this line of thinking led me to put a pondering thought into my status update to which I expected no reply because for some reason in my mind it was as if no one was reading it and I was just thinking aloud. However, people actually read it! Who'd have thunk it? I'm guessing they were just reading it as though I was feeling bad for myself, when in all actuality I was rejoicing because my day had been so wonderful without my anger.

To wrap up, getting the comments from people trying to make me feel better reminded me of my thoughts in the shower of how I'm just "misunderstood". I've decided, though, that it's not necessarily because people don't get me. People just think differently than I do. I don't laugh at every joke I hear. Why should I expect all people to like mine? I don't agree with everything that is said around me. Why should I expect everyone to agree with me? I could probably go on, but you get the picture. But how void would life be if we all laughed at the same things, ate the same food, read the same books, wore the same clothes? It really is a good thing that not everyone thinks I'm wonderful and hilarious (although I am).